Friday, August 1, 2008

Bloggers Everywhere Resisting Urge To Type "Houston We Have A Problem Child"

Apparently Yao Ming is a little wary of his new teammate, Ron Artest. I certainly have no idea why that would be. Ron seems to think it's because the thirty-seven other black guys on the Rockets don't really represent the culture like he does, not because he, you know, punches people. He thinks Yao just isn't used to ghetto. Actually, the Rockets could probably use a little ghetto. Maybe Ron can turn T-Mac into less of a pussy. Maybe he can make Yao stop apologizing to the other team for blocking their shot. Maybe it's time Houston's two best players tried not being pillowy soft and started going Ron Ron on some folks. They could also try not being injured for 90% of the season. By the way, is Steve Francis really still technically on this team? Really?

The Teensy Weensy Stack

Wolverine #67
Mark Millar has definitely come up with some enjoyable possible-Marvel-future quirks which stem from the fact that the villains from his 1985 series clearly somehow win and take over the world. Which world that is remains to be seen, but it's surely one where Spidey doesn't get back together with Mary Jane... unless they adopt. I'm not sure how this will tie in with Fantastic Four yet, but props for bringing the badass back to Hawkeye. (A)

Green Lantern #33
The reasons for the retelling of Hal Jordan's origin begin to become clear as Geoff Johns shows the seed planting for the Blackest Night saga. I just wish it would hurry up and get here so I know that this was worth it. I do, however, like the way Johns clouds GL's identity from Carol Ferris. Always nice to give a reason why superheroes' girlfriends never realize their dudes' secret identities. (A-)

Thor #10
We're almost a year into this series and Thor still hasn't fought @#$%, save for a brief argument with Iron Man and an imaginary tussle alongside his pops in the underworld. Don't get me wrong, this everlasting setup is extremely well written and the art is beautiful, but can't something happen every once in a while? And how many pin-up covers of Thor just standing around can we possibly need? (B)

Deschutes Inversion IPA

If an ignorant beer drinker wanted to know what an IPA tasted like, this might be the perfect example to give them. It's hoppy, but unaggressive and shouldn't blow away those with a lesser trained palate. It's got the average citrus and floral flavors with the hint of pine and a sunshiney reddish amber hue. It boasts a 6.8% ABV and while it's a truly refreshing and crisp brew, it doesn't necessarily bring anything new to the table. She may not be a video chick or able to put both legs over her head, but you certainly wouldn't kick this one out of bed. (B)