By the way, just once, it would be nice if Bendis could end a giant fight without some ridiculous and contrived deus ex machina that has no right to work, and even if it did, would have been used before the fight even started, saving everyone a whole lot of hassle.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
New Avengers #50, Now Featuring Three Panels Of Girl On Girl Strap-On Action
By the way, just once, it would be nice if Bendis could end a giant fight without some ridiculous and contrived deus ex machina that has no right to work, and even if it did, would have been used before the fight even started, saving everyone a whole lot of hassle.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Friday, February 20, 2009
In Case You Forgot, Kobe Bryant Is An @$$hole
Must be nice when every referee in the NBA wants to suck your @#$%.
Drake's Denogginizer
A quick whiff of a freshly poured glass of this Imperial IPA will fill your nose with dew coated grass and a cool tropical breeze. Its color is solid amber and it holds a creamy white head that leads the way to an easy drinking yet flavorful brew. It's more reminiscent of a barleywine than an IPA and its blend of fruitiness gives it a significantly east coast vibe. The taste doesn't quite live up to the initial smell that seems to disguise a light malty funkiness. Another helping of hops would definitely serve this beer well, as in true Drake's tradition it slightly misses the bulls-eye. It feels like a fairly decent NYC chick transplanted to LA who falls into the unfortunate trap of the latest hipster fashions and dampens what hotness she has with stretch pants, skinny headbands, and slotted sunglasses. I mean, you'd totally still do her, but not quite as enthusiastically as you'd like. She probably won't notice though, cuz you totally remind her of that dude from MGMT. (B+)
Ashton Kutcher To Learn The Mechanics Of Whiskey Chugging And Neck Beards
That's right, Ashton Kutcher is set to star in a movie about a superstar NFL quarterback who switches bodies with a geeky twelve-year-old and will be learning the basics of QB-ing from none other than Chicago's finest, Kyle Orton. At the very least, Kyle will be able to give some pointers on having out-of-body experiences. Meanwhile, Rex Grossman will be advising Kutcher on how to behave like a twelve-year-old. It's all in the hands.
Guess It's A Good Thing The Bulls Didn't Get Amare
Just days after the Phoenix Suns decided not to trade him, it looks like Amare Stoudemire will miss the rest of the season anyway, after undergoing surgery to repair a detached retina. I bet Shaq is super happy that trade to the LeBrons didn't happen either. The Suns aren't the only team that will be missing a big man to start the second half, as Kevin Garnett could be out up to four weeks with a knee injury. Good thing I have tickets to that Celtic-Clipper game next week.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
The Swapping Of The Weird Beards
With the Suns smartly deciding to hold on to Amare Stoudemire, the Chicago Bulls have settled for one of the other big men on the trade market and re-acquired Brad "Corn Rows" Miller from the Sacremento Kings along with breakout scoring machine John Salmons. The Bulls had to part with the never-living-up-to-his-potential Drew Gooden and his expiring contract as well as firey fan favorite Andres Nocioni. The move should be an upgrade if Miller can stay healthy and Salmons can get close to the playing time he now expects. Today's trade of Larry Hughes to the Knicks should help in that department. Chicago will also get to enjoy the services / cutting of Jerome "Garbage Man" James and old friend Tim Thomas who played about six minutes for the Bulls last time he was on the team. Most importantly, Chicago should have plenty of money for the 2010 free agent extravaganza and may land Amare or Chris Bosh after all.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
Mini Murray
The Ghostbuster toy revolution continues. Also, the one Lego Indiana Jones set that may be worth $80.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
The Greatest Thing I'll See Today
The Iron Fist Super Hero Squad figure was finally revealed today at the NYCC. Also spotted were Bullseye, Bishop, Deathlok, Blob, Havok, X-23, and a whack Mr. Sinister. Moonknight, Nova, and Tigra are supposedly on the way as well. Purrr. Check here for pics. If that's not enough, peep this hot like fire Spidey & His Amazing Friends 3-pack for the MU line. Wow. I am a nerd. At least I'm a sexy nerd.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
And In News From The World Of Awesome...
Soon, these will not be the only Ghostbusters figures you can reenact the twinkie scene with. Word has it Mattel is set to launch both a 12 and 6-inch line of actual movie-inspired GB toys... i.e. you will finally be able to own a for-reals Bill Murray action figure. Okay, can you breathe again? Good. Distribution is unclear at this point, but look for them to start showing up on eBay in the late summer.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
That's More Like It Guy
With RocknRolla, Guy Ritchie finally returns to the genre he's unfortunately been trying to avoid: The Guy Ritchie Ridiculous Gangster Movie. While not quite as highly stylized as Snatch and Lock Stock, RockNRolla has the good old sprawling plot and absurdly deep cast of comical London street thugs we've come to love and expect from him. Thankfully, he's gotten back to the basics and done away with the contrived psychodrama of Revolver in exchange for the fun, violence, and cockney posturing of his original films. It's a mostly new cast this time around, with Gerard Butler and Stringer Bell stepping in for Jason Statham and Vinnie Jones. The additions of Jeremy Piven and Ludacris seem a bit unnecessary, as do their characters, but unnecessary characters are what Guy Ritchie movies are all about. While RocknRolla doesn't seem to have the freshness of Lock Stock or the over-the-top style of Snatch, it remains a ride worth riding and the promise of a sequel is one worth keeping. (B)
Are There Any Government Officials That Actually DO Pay Their Taxes?
Well, looks like another one bites the dust in the game of Survivor that is the Obama cabinet. Shortly after Obama's nomination for Chief Performance Officer withdrew her name due to undisclosed tax issues, Tom Daschle has also pulled out of his nomination for HHS Secretary because of his own blunders with the IRS. While Timothy Geitner was able to survive his failure to operate Turbo Tax correctly, Daschle's $140,000 in owed back taxes for car service proved his undoing. Apparently he hired Bruce Wayne himself to drive him around in the Batmobile since the tax alone on this shuttle service was in the six figures. I don't know whether all these tax snafu's are coming to the surface because of the high economic scrutiny of the times of the reform of Washington ethics promised by Obama, but if we eliminate every capable public servant because they forgot to check box 34B on page 372C of their 1034EZ or called a receipt for cigs a business expense, Barack may be running this country by himself. It wasn't too long ago Ted Stevens corrupt ass was convicted for failing to report a quarter million in gifts, and that sonuvabitch got reelected to the Senate. We should be so lucky if tax shenanigans are the worst skeletons in the cabinet. At least it's not dead hookers. Just let these people pay what they owe and get on with helping the country. That being said, if you work in mother @#$%ing government, learn how to do your mother @#$%ing taxes. Ass.
Monday, February 2, 2009
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