Beer Fridays Beerstravaganza Part 1: The Top (Or Bottom) Five Worst Beers Known To Man

Beer is good. That much we know. Not all that is brewed, however, is brewed equally. Some beer really does not deserve the name and should instead be classified as some sort of torture device or biological weaponry. These are beverages suitable only for shotgunning teenagers and dirty backyard wrestlers. Such are those listed below... the worst five "beers" known to man.

5. Milwaukee's Best
While unfathomably cheap, The Beast is flavored with the most putrid of rancid ass juice. It consists mostly of watery yeast, which makes me wonder what Milwaukee's Best Light could possible contain. The only reason it's not higher on the list is THIS.


4. Coors Light
It's pretty much just water with yellow food coloring. I suppose you could drink it while you work out or something. And twins.



3. Keystone Ice
Otherwise known as a liquid headache, Keystone Ice is high on alcohol but tastes like the tin man's anus and feels like a crowbar to the brain.



2. Natural Light
Ah, Natty Light, many a chubby sorority girl's panties have been dropped thanks to you. It tastes like white trash and should only be consumed through a funnel while wearing a wife beater. Also, it inspires this douchery.


1. Michelob Ultra / Heineken Light
I suspect that there are two evil marketing geniuses snickering and twirling their mustaches in their secret island hideaways because they've actually gotten people to pay for bottles of watered down urine. All they had to do was call it low carb and have hot girls give you flashing buttons at bars. Seriously people, I'm almost positive you can get pee for free.